With the Christmas party season upon us, there's one thing women need to ask themselves: am I a schmoozer, a singleton or a party girl?

Having fun can be tough work. There's dress stress, small talk dilemmas, and that tricky juggling routine when you have to shake hands while holding a glass of wine and a mini party quiche.

The festive party season, says life alchemist John Rushton, can bring a "mixture of dread and excitement".

But if you reckon you're the only person in the room who believes everybody else is having more fun, think again.

"To be honest a lot of people think that way - they always think they're the only ones not enjoying themselves, everyone's getting along famously," Mr Rushton says.

"Whereas deep down, probably about a third of the people there, their stomachs will be churning a little bit... it's not uncommon."

So far as parties go, your best defence is to be prepared - get to know the terrain and the population. With that in mind, here's our spotter's guide to partygoers you're likely to bump into this festive season.

Hostess

How to spot: She's the one fussing over place settings, and hurriedly spooning M&S pesto into a serving bowl to pull off as her own.

Tips to take: Great hostesses put their guests at ease and thoughtfully introduce them to one another. Make a beeline for people standing on their own, take the time to chat and introduce them to your group of friends - you'll have done your good deed for the day, and might end up with some interesting new mates.

What to do if it's you: Don't panic! The more laidback you are, the more relaxed and welcome your guests will feel. And don't apologise for the food/decorations/interior design - if you don't make a big deal of it, nobody will ever know.

Wallflower

How to spot: Wallflowers hang out in unlikely nooks and crannies - the loo, the stairwell - nearing nervous breakdown at the thought of talking to someone.

Tips to take: While not the most social of creatures, these gals are great listeners - something most of us could learn from. Let others hog the limelight occasionally, and never interrupt someone else's anecdote for your own.

What to do if it's you: Take a deep breath, close your eyes and realise you're not actually in hell. Come armed with some pre-prepared conversation starters - Who's your favourite Bond? Which celeb would you most like to smack? - or volunteer to hand around the snacks and drinks: that way you'll always have something to talk about.

Party girl

How to spot: The party girl is the one with the sauciest-named cocktail in her hand, the tiniest dress on her curves and the red hot dancing shoes that'll move to any beat.

Tips to take: This girl knows how to have fun. Block out all thoughts of bank balances, family problems or what time you've got to get up for work tomorrow, and just let the good times roll.

What to do if it's you: There is such a thing as being too drunk, too loud, or doing too much falling over. Eat before you go out, have a water chaser for every alcoholic drink you knock back and plan your route home before your fifth cocktail. And be a little circumspect about your shenanigans - you don't want to end up as 'Drunk Girl 314' on YouTube tomorrow morning.

Flirt

How to spot: She's a man magnet - always surrounded by the best-looking blokes. When she's on the pull, you can feel it from the other side of the room.

Tips to take: A good flirt knows how to make others feel special. Turn on the charm with some light-hearted banter, enthusiasm, humour, smiles and compliments. And if you spot someone you like, make your move - successful flirts take risks.

What to do if it's you: You might be No 1 with the fellas, but be sure not to alienate your female friends - save some charm for them too. Also be aware of the signals you're giving out. Men are apt to interpret friendliness for sexual interest, so be careful who you might be leading on.

Schmoozer

How to spot: Every party is a networking opportunity to this go-getter. She'll be juggling her BlackBerry and business card holder, talking about synergies and shareholders.

Tips to take: A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. Parties are great for meeting new contacts in a non-work environment - just don't talk shop all evening or you'll come off as a bore.

What to do if it's you: If you meet someone you think might be able to help in your professional life, speak up - then get their contact details and call them two or three days later to arrange a meeting. Nobody wants to be bullied into being your personal career counsellor - especially at a party.

Singleton

How to spot: She may or may not be happy about her lack of significant other, but she'll be surrounded by friends and ready for fun.

Tips to take: If you are in a couple, don't be afraid to lone wolf it occasionally - go out without your partner and remember what it felt like not to be a part of a matching set. If you're out together, try mingling separately. You can always share your adventures later.

What to do if it's you: Don't get drunk and hold your own pity party climaxing in a slurred version of I Will Survive on the karaoke machine. Or if you do, remember one of the great joys of flying solo - you won't have to explain it to your partner afterwards.