Love or just a good time?

How can you tell whether your date is after a long-term relationship or simply a one-night stand?

You would expect it to be straightforward - their profile says that they're looking for a long-term relationship, yet when you go on a date you wonder whether you're dating an octopus!

- See who's single near you

If she's showing almost as much cleavage as a page three model, or he's rubbing his thighs like he's trying to make a fire, maybe your date has more immediate things in mind...

Message clues

Keep a watch for playful messages. Does your potential date describe himself/herself as looking for a good time, or as 'broadminded' or 'free-spirited'? If their messages are concerned with hobbies, career aspirations or favourite films, you can guess that they are interested in at least having a conversation first.

The choice of venue

Has your date suggested meeting in the local nightclub or a book/coffee shop? If it's the former, they could be after some up-close-and-personal fun on the dance floor. A restaurant, theatre or coffee shop is a more natural place for someone wanting to strike up a conversation.

I am a
man woman
looking for a
woman man
postcode

Already a member? Log in

Body talk

Some people will shake hands when they first meet; others will give a peck on the cheek. It's hard to know how your date usually greets people, so reserve judgement. However, a kiss on the lips needs no interpretation.

Watch your date's body language throughout the evening. If they touch you lightly on the arm or leg or get closer to you as the night goes on, their intentions may be more physical than conversational.

Lip service

Over-enthusiasm can indicate desperation. If they start singing your praises the moment they see you and the compliments don't stop throughout the entire duration of the date, be a little wary as they may be trying to sweet-talk their way into your pants. However, if their compliments are more low-key, they're probably less sidetracked by animal urges.

The ex

Your date's relationship history can provide valuable information about the type of relationship they're looking for. Are they on the rebound? Pay attention to the ex files!

When the date draws to a close

As the evening comes to an end, it should become clearer whether your date is looking for a short-term fling or a long-term thing. If they push you against a wall and kiss you, it's up to you to decide whether you want to move that fast. If they give you a polite peck on the cheek and say they'd like to see you again, they obviously want to take time to get to know you better.

Coffee?

At the end of the date, if you get asked in for coffee, this is usually an indicator that the person would like you to stay the night. However, it could also mean that they would like to make you a cup of coffee. There's nothing wrong in being upfront and asking coffee or 'coffee'? Be careful not to confuse the two as this could have embarrassing consequences unless you don't mind sipping your cappuccino in the buff.

What you need to do

If you're after something more long-term, be sure to say that you've had a lovely time, but hold back at the end of the date. There is no rush, and less is definitely more. However, if you're looking for something more short-term, go for it, but make sure that your date isn't expecting something less casual.