Manipulative, moody, unreliable and contradictory, you're one (sorry, two) slippery fish. You change your mind so frequently that others are worn out just being around you. One minute you're giving up smoking and the next you're asking for a light. That's another thing you're hopeless at - willpower.

When you're not leading others on a chaotic dance you can be found moping in a café. You have a crippling sense of martyrdom and like to take every opportunity to feel hard done by. Why must everyone put you under so much pressure? How were you to know you wanted a cappuccino when you asked for a latte?

Dating and relationships
You're not too picky when it comes to the dating game. In fact, you'll let anyone buy you a drink as long as they listen to your emotional sob story. Three glasses of wine later, you decide that the person sat opposite you is your soul mate, until that is, you fall in love with the waiter on the way back from the toilet.

You like to think of yourself as a hopeless romantic. The truth is that you're just plain hopeless. You drift in and out of relationships and like nothing better than to splash around in someone else's emotional depths for a change. If you should find an emotional anchor, hold on to them with all you've got.

At work
You were probably hired because of your creativity; either that or you lied on your CV. You are ambitious, although not particularly hard working. You hate following procedures and process bores you to tears. Office politics is your chosen route to success, and relaying snippets of information is what you excel at.

When you are not gossiping you can be found wandering around the office with a glazed over expression, lost in some fantastical daydream where you slay the monster and save the day. Unfortunately for you, your boss thinks you stare because you're plain weird and not, as you like to think, engaged in some left-brain problem solving activity.