If you've been jilted, don't get angry - get fit, says Siobhan Mason

The end of a relationship is the perfect time to drum up the motivation to kickstart a fitness regime. Maybe you feel fat, ugly and unlovable and hope a few sessions at the gym will turn you into a desirable babe again. Perhaps it's a case of wanting to fill those aching gaps in the evenings or weekends or feeling that taking to a punch-bag is the only way to release all pent-up hostility. Then there's the sudden realisation - heaven forbid - that one day you will be naked in front of someone new. That alone is enough reason to send you scuttling to the gym.

'You might spend a few days feeling grotty, lying in bed crying and looking at old photos,' says martial artist and personal trainer, Ann-Marie Millard, co-author of Kick Your Way to Fitness(Thorsons, £12.99) and founder of Fusion Fitness, a national agency of martial artists and personal trainers. 'But after the initial misery, you start to think, "I'll show him. Just wait until he sees the new me. I'm going to look fantastic."'

Aiming to look drop-dead gorgeous so that your ex regrets ever letting you go may seem like misguided motivation, but if it's effective in getting you off the couch and improving your health, who cares? 'Vanity's a great motivator,' says Millard. Whatever your goal, after a break-up concentrating your energies on working out can do wonders for your psyche as well as your physique.

'When I split up from my last boyfriend, I went on an exercise binge,' admits 26-year-old Nicola Harrison. 'I biked to work everyday and went running in the evenings. I thought to myself, "Look what I can do, I don't need you - here's what you're missing." Exercise every day helped me feel confident about myself physically, but it also helped me feel in control and independent.'

'The break-up of a relationship is painful, no matter who initiates it,' says London-based life coach and ashtanga yoga instructor, Michael Myerscough, 'but you can turn that pain into something positive by taking up regular exercise.' In fact, he insists that it's impossible to work out and feel miserable at the same time. 'Working out keeps the rational side of your mind busy, while your subconscious gets on with processing everything in the background,' he says. 'Exercise also releases endorphins - your body's own feelgood chemicals - giving you the same feeling as chocolate without the calories or the cavities.'

Liz Murray, aged 30, found that a weight-training session three times a week was the perfect outlet for her anger after being ditched by her man. 'I started exercising because I wanted to look better, but kept it up because it made me feel so great. If I'd had a miserable self-pitying day, I knew going to the gym would make me feel fantastic for at least 20 minutes afterwards.' In short, a regular workout can help keep you sane. The fit, toned body that results is just an added bonus.

Here's our guide to finding the perfect type of exercise to suit your particular break-up woes.

Break-up scenario: jilted for another

Tempted to: drown your sorrows, plan revenge

What you should do: take up martial arts such as karate, kick-boxing or tae bo

Why? 'Martial arts workouts are great for releasing pent-up anger,' says Millard. 'All that kicking and punching helps vent your frustration and stops you from directing your anger at someone else.'

• To find a qualified martial arts instructor, contact the Amateur Martial Arts Association at 120 Croma Street, London WC1H 8BS (020 7837 4406).
• Anne-Marie Millard is creator of Fusion Fitness, a national agency of martial artists and personal trainers, where you can find a personal trainer qualified in at least two different disciplines - such as yoga, martial arts or aerobics. Call 020 8374 6087 for details of a trainer near you.
• For more detailed information on the different types of martial arts, go to kick butt martial arts style.

Break-up scenario: endless arguments ruined the relationship

Tempted to: blame all the rows on your ex-boyfriend

What you should do: take up reflective and mind-calming exercises such as yoga

Why? 'Yoga and meditation allow you the time and space to know yourself as an individual as opposed to who you were as part of a couple,' says Myerscough. 'It also helps promote a strong mind and gives you confidence, a sense of energy and an enthusiasm for life.' What's more, think of all the uses for that newfound flexibility when you find your next man.

• To find a yoga class near you, contact the British Wheel of Yoga on 01529 306851, or log onto their website and check out the teacher's directory at The British Wheel of Yoga website.Contact Michael Myerscough on 020 8374 2499.

Break-up scenario: the seven-year itch, boredom, drifted apart

Tempted to: leave your job, move house or leave the country

What you should do: go on a mountain biking trip or active weekend away

Why? Trying out an adventurous activity, such as white-water rafting, gorge walking or mountain biking is a great way to inject some excitement into your life, according to London-based personal trainer, Dennis Duhoney, the man behind the break-up induced transformation of Vanessa Feltz.

• Black Mountain Activities hold adventure days for adults and children. Log onto www.blackmountain.co.uk or call 01497 847897 for more information.