I have a two month old son by my ex. We’re no longer together because he cheated on me with his ex, who he’s now back with. They have a two-year-old child together and he’s been going around telling people that she’s his one true love because she’s the mother of his first child. Now she’s announced to me that she and I have to get on because our children are brothers - I don’t want her anywhere near me or my son! How do I cope?

Susan advises
You cope quite simply by being clear about what you want - and not letting what other people want affect you.

Your boyfriend’s ex may prefer that you and she ‘get on’, She may prefer it firstly because she doesn’t want any trouble from you and secondly because it makes her feel less guilty. But that doesn’t mean you have to go along with this.

In fact, while there may be financial reasons to keep in contact with your ex - and you may want your baby to have access to his Dad - frankly I’d cut her right out of your life. She not only slept with your ex when you were pregnant with his child, she also took him back when he left you to look after that child. What’s to like about either of them?

So quickly, cleanly - and permanently - cut contact. There is no reason why you should have anything more to do with this woman or her child.