Ever since leaving school, my childhood friends and I have met up for a drunken night out on Christmas Eve. I used to really enjoy it - it was great to let our hair down. But the last few years I just haven't had as much fun. I don't seem to have much in common with most of them any more, so the conversation's always a bit awkward. I'm thinking of not turning up this year, but I feel terrible about rejecting my old friends.

Susan advises
I don't think you're rejecting your old friends. I do think that you're probably growing out of them. What you did at eighteen - getting drunk and giggling a lot - isn't quite so much fun several years down the line. And though they may not have moved on and started to mature, it seems to me that you have.

So what to do about it? You certainly need to make a change. Perhaps suggest to the group that you do something different - given supper rather than the pub, or a quiet drink in rather than a riotous night out, you could find you have more in common with them than you think.

If that doesn't work, then I would let the whole thing go. Next year (or even this year if you read this in time) make other arrangements and then cry off. Parallel to this, you could also choose one or two friends that you do get on with and arrange to go to supper one-on-one - build your friendship with them separately and you'll probably find it works.

And don't give yourself a hard time. Friendships come and go, and growing out of this friendship group is entirely natural.