It's been a tough year for me: three months ago my husband and I found out that our fertility treatment had failed to work, again. We've since decided to give up trying for a baby and focus on other things. I was doing well but now Christmas is here - and I have to go to my parent's and meet my brother's new baby girl. I want to be happy for him, stay positive and not ruin the mood but I'm scared it'll all be too much and I'll end up bursting into tears. Help!

Susan advises
Hold on, what's so awful about bursting into tears?

My bet is that everyone in your family knows that you've been struggling with your fertility treatment and may already expect you to find it difficult being around your brother's new baby. In fact, your brother is probably more aware of how you feel than you realise - I've no doubt he's worried about the potential for hurting you by bringing his new baby along.

Bottom line, family life is about the joys and the tragedies. Your brother's new arrival is wonderful - but your loss is just as important. Warn a few key family members (like your Mum) that you may find the Christmas get-together a bit difficult this year. And why not also ring your brother and his wife to say how much you're looking forward to seeing them and their new baby but also explain how you're feeling - that way if the tears do begin to fall, they'll be prepared and ready to understand.

Best advice? Let down your British reserve, let the tears flow and get lots of comfort from your loved ones. After all, that's what families are for and Christmas is a time for coming together.