I've been seeing my partner for three months and am deeply in love. But he's been having business problems, so I agreed to lend him £9000. Unfortunately, when I went to draw the cheque I found that I didn't have the money available instantly - so I lied to him to cover my embarrassment. But when he discovered the lie he broke with me - I keep asking him to forgive me but he won't. What should I do?

Susan advises
What should you do? Run like the wind, that's what. You have only known this man for three months and yet he is asking you for a huge amount of money. When you don't deliver on time he throws a wobblie. This is not a man who can be trusted.

I know that you are deeply in love - and like many people, women in particular, you think that means you should give everything to your beloved. But that's only a good idea when he cares for you too, when he is trustworthy and generous in return. I'm not saying you should keep a strict count, tally up what you give against what you are given. But to simply hand over everything without knowing the person you are handing it over to is not love - it is foolishness.

So don't keep chasing this man - he's bad news. Instead, grit your teeth and get over him.

But also, raise your self-confidence. You obviously feel you have to buy other people's affection, you obviously trust they will love you for yourself. Give yourself credit, value what you have to offer. If you believe you are worth loving, then hopefully you won't again be taken in by a con artist like your recent boyfriend.